In Loving Memory of Marvin J. Bostin

Obituary - Eulogy - My Way - Photos - Funeral Video

In lieu of flowers, donations may be made in memory of Marvin Bostin to the Connecticut Chapter of the Alzheimer's Association at

Delivered by Marvin's son, Shep, on September 22, 2023.

I'm about to break an important rule of public speaking that I have coached people on countless times. I'm going to stand here and read from my notes because if I look at you all, I'm not going to make it.

I sat down to begin writing yesterday and thought how do you summarize an incredible 90-year life in a few minutes? I began to write and even with trying to be brief, I ended up with five single-spaced pages. Anyone who knows my father and me, knows that telling a short story can be a bit of a challenge.

So then I thought let me just focus on the 57 years where I knew my dad, but I doubt that you all want to stand here until sunset for that story.

So then I thought, let me focus on just some of the people who dad touched through the course of his life. Are you kidding me? My dad had family and friends that span not just countries but continents and time zones! It was clear that strategy would not work either.

But then it dawned on me that a eulogy is not an obituary. The not-so-short obituary that I wrote has been posted to the website where I will add in some additional pictures and memories later today.

Instead of trying to capture an entire lifespan in a few minutes, I decided instead to focus on a single recent memory. A memory from just two weeks ago - the last time that I saw my dad awake and responsive. All of us here know the disease that slowly robbed my dad of a lot of the wonderful memories of his long life. And yet, strangely enough, his sense of humor never left. The basic elements of his personality remained. From kidding around with men, to flirting with women, to funny Yiddish expressions, to his ever-present love of chocolate.

When I was here a couple of weeks ago dad was not very conversational. He was tired, he was uncomfortable, and he didn't want to eat much. But I sat with him, took out my phone, and found a video of one of his favorite Frank Sinatra songs - My Way. This song that I can remember him loving for all my life. I pushed play on the video and the music began.

As the lyrics started, he began to sing along. This man from whom so many precious memories had been taken over the last few years sung every word of this song flawlessly. I can't possibly start to repeat these lyrics right now, there's just no way I'd get through it. I'll post them to the site later.

But we all know how the song ends and I think it's a fitting end for my dad that he sang as loud as he could, "I Did It My Way".